Maternity Leaflet: Parents Wishing to Take their Baby Home After Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Neonatal Death

Parents Wishing to Take their Baby Home After Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Neonatal Death: This leaflet is intended to help guide you through the practical steps to enable you to take your baby home. Women and parents should be offered the choice of whether they wish to take their baby home. (However, please note: if a Coroner is involved it will not be possible to take your baby home)

Leaflet Details

Patient Information

About this Leaflet

This leaflet is intended to help guide you through the practical steps to enable you to take your baby home. Women and parents should be offered the choice of whether they wish to take their baby home. (However, please note: if a Coroner is involved it will not be possible to take your baby home)

This will not be the right option for everyone, and parents may prefer to spend time with their baby in hospital and be supported, which is very precious.

INTRODUCTION

May we offer our condolences to you at this difficult time.

This could be the most traumatic and emotional time of your lives and you may be experiencing feelings that vary from shock to disbelief. During this time, it is not always easy to focus on what the midwifery and nursing staff are saying to you and so this leaflet will help to clarify some of the practical advice that you will need.

The potential benefits for parents who take their baby home include:

• Having more time with your baby away from the hospital, giving you the opportunity to say goodbye in the privacy of your own home.
   
• Time to introduce your baby to siblings, family and friends
   
• Give you more time to make memories and gather keepsakes to last a lifetime. Where appropriate, if you would like to you can bathe, dress, and cuddle your baby. (this may not be possible for very tiny babies)

TRANSPORTING YOUR BABY HOME

• You need to travel in your own private vehicle
   
• It would be advisable to have a family member / friend to take you all home, the journey may be very emotional, and this could compromise your safety.
   
• You can either carry and travel with your baby in a car seat or in a Moses basket secured by a seat belt. If you do not have a Moses basket, then we may be able to provide one for you to borrow.
  
  Alternatively, it may be more appropriate or if you prefer, for us to provide a small casket for carrying your baby.
   
• Parking your car as near to the maternity unit as possible would be advisable, staff will be able to suggest the best place for you.
   
• You may like a member of staff to accompany you and your baby to your car. Please ask if you would like this.
   
• You will be given a copy of the “Taking your Baby Home” form which you have signed. This will prevent any misunderstandings should you get stopped on the way home or if you are involved in any road traffic accident during your journey.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT HOME

We would like to let you know about the possible changes that may occur with baby’s appearance over the next few days and that these changes are normal.

The changes may be:

• Discoloration (darkening) of the skin and lips
   
• Baby’s skin may become fragile and start to peel Sometimes you may notice some pink fluid leaking from baby’s nose, mouth or skin.
   
• Baby may begin to feel a little stiff and will feel cool to touch

To help slow down these changes it is important that you are aware of how to care for your baby in the home environment.

• Keep the baby in a cool room, with no heating on.
   
• Keep all windows closed, especially in hot weather.
   
• Ensure all pets are kept out of the room.
   
• Use a muslin / net / light cotton covering over baby’s basket.
   
• It is important to keep your baby cool. This is best achieved by placing your baby on any kind of a covered ice pack. Covering the icepack first is important as this will protect the baby and keep their skin dry.
   
• Where appropriate, a CuddleCot, especially designed to keep baby cool, will be available for you to borrow for use at home, if required. You will be shown how to use the cuddle cot and a plan made with you for its return.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

It is important that you know the arrangements for after you have taken baby home.

You may take baby home for a few days (1-3 days) while you make your arrangements for baby.

Pregnancy loss pre 24 weeks gestation:

• There is no legal process for you to register your loss.
   
• You may take your baby home and either:
   
• Bury your baby yourself

OR

• Arrange a private burial or cremation using a funeral director or your faith leader to make the arrangements

OR

• A hospital arranged cremation or burial for babies between 12 weeks and 23+6 weeks gestation.

You can still take your baby home for a few days then return baby to the hospital for the hospital arranged cremation service

• If you wish to bury your baby yourself, (only for babies less than 24 weeks gestation who show no signs of life at birth) you are required to follow certain guidelines. Please refer to the guidelines listed at the end of this leaflet:

Pregnancy Loss after 24 weeks gestation:

• Your baby must have an official cremation or burial. You are not permitted to bury baby yourself.
   
• You will need to contact the Registrar of Births, Marriages, and Deaths to arrange an appointment to register your baby’s birth / death.
   
• You will need to contact a funeral director or faith leader to commence arrangements for your baby’s funeral.
   
• Your funeral director will usually collect your baby from your home, or you may return baby to the hospital to be collected at a later time by your chosen funeral director
   
• If you have chosen to take your baby home, a community midwife will visit daily while your baby is at home for support until baby is collected by your funeral director.

Bringing Baby Back to the Hospital

If your baby is to have a post-mortem a plan will be made with you before you go home for bringing baby back to the hospital.

Similarly, if you have requested a hospital arranged cremation service a plan will be made with you for return of your baby to the hospital.

If you would like to return baby earlier than the agreed date or time or if you have changed your mind about having your baby at home for any reason, please ring the Labour Ward Co-Ordinator on 01932 722399 to make arrangements.

Guidelines to be followed if you wish to carry out your own burial

(Only for babies born less than 24 weeks gestation born with no signs of life)

• It is essential that you obtain permission to complete a burial where you are not the owner of the land involved. If necessary, you should contact HM Land Registry to check who is the registered owner.
   
• If you have a mortgage or loan against the property where the baby is to be buried, you should notify any company or individual who has an interest in the property
   
• You should record the date and place of burial in a formal letter that should be attached to the title deeds of your property or land
   
• Your baby must be wrapped or buried in an environmentally biodegradable material (plastic containers etc. must not be used)
   
• There must be no danger to water courses or supplies and there must be no danger of any bodily products leaking into adjoining land.
   
• The burial site should not be within 10 metres of any standing or running water, or 50 metres of a well, borehole or spring that supplies water for human consumption.
   
• The baby must be buried at a depth of at least 45 centimetres. You should be aware that such a burial may deter future prospective purchasers or occupiers and may therefore affect the resale value.
   
• You may wish to contact the Environmental Health Department of your local borough council to ensure that the burial site meets their safety standards for any watercourses or other local issues.

Contact Details

This is a very difficult and emotional time for all the family and below is a list of contact details that may be useful to you now and / or in the future.